Kirby and the Forgotten Land removes Kirby’s ability to kiss

A plump, pink character and his plump, spear-wielding friend smile on a grassy hillside.

screenshot: Nintendo

I have a great time with Kirby and the forgotten land. The pink puffball’s sugary, post-apocalyptic journey is the perfect palate cleanser after exploring the crowd elden ring. But one inside forgotten land bothers me more than any horror that could spring from the minds of Hidetaka Miyazaki and George RR Martin: Kirby no longer makes out with his buddies.

In previous co-op games, Kirby and his partners would briefly hug to share health-restoring items. Kirby and the forgotten land, but eliminates this by having the eponymous hero and Bandana high-five Waddle Dee (a spear-wielding fighter automatically assigned to player two) instead. Like all things Kirby, it’s pretty damn adorable, but not quite the interaction I was hoping for.

The food-sharing mechanic of the series dates back to the 1996s Kirby Superstar, the SNES mega-compilation that many consider to be the franchise’s most iconic sequel. A quick look at the game’s North American instruction manual shows this move, written as “to lend[ing] a helping hand,” but come on. Look at those. That’s a fucking kiss.

While the technique later appeared under different names like “Face-to-Face” and “Item Share”, the Kirby fighter spin-off series solidified what we all knew to be true by adding a large “SMOOCH” graphic over the characters’ heads whenever they were, well, smooching. And it’s not like these are old games either; Kirby Fighters 2 just released on Switch in 2020.

Cartoon characters kissing each other "smooch" Graphics above their heads.

screenshot: Nintendo

This is where I could get upset and point out how, I don’t know, armed force was found to be fine forgotten land while a sweet hug between two friends has kind of crossed the line at Nintendo. But the truth is, I’m just a little weirdo who wants to see Kirby and Bandana Waddle Dee cuddle. Is there something inherently sexual about exchanging friends? a quick kiss to recover during an intense fight?

I do not think so. Let her kiss, Nintendo. Kirby and the Forgotten Land removes Kirby’s ability to kiss

Curtis Crabtree

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