Remember when players got upset about the OG Mass Effect 3 using a stock photo of an attractive human woman to reveal what fan-favorite Quarian Tali looks like unmasked? Well, apparently developer BioWare wants you to forget all about that, because by the way Put Tali’s portrait in a little less Getty In Mass Effect Legendary Editionthe game maker is now selling merch of her updated, debunked portrait.
The Mass Effect Tali Zorah Framed Photo Replica is exactly as advertised on the tin: a metal frame with a brutalist acrylic window and a tasteful portrait print of a Tali’Zorah vas Normandy for $30. To the uninitiated, a photo of an attractive alien lady might seem fairly rudimentary compared to other, flashier BioWare products like one Garrus Vakarian Body Pillowbut the photo holds great meaning for some where Tali has had a romance BioWare’s Remastered Space Trilogy.
In case Tali lovers need some IRL romance flavored text to convince them to add their replica photo to their cart, a love letter from the purple humanoid alien girl is included on the product description page.
As you may remember, I gave you this picture frame in Normandy. It was my way of expressing my admiration for you and our bond as comrades-in-arms. On the back of the metal frame I emblazoned a promise that will never fade: “Shepard, wherever you go, I’m with you.”
I know it’s not much, but… this is what I look like under the mask. I’m sorry if it’s not what you expected. I know quarian faces can be a little… different. I hope that every time you look at my picture you will be reminded of our adventures in Normandy, from our battles against the Reapers to our intimate conversations in the privacy of our quarters.
I’m not the type to openly express my feelings, but thank you for being my friend, my confidante and my inspiration. I look forward to many more adventures together.
I bet Tali took that last line from the space telenovelas she loves so much. Nerd.
Continue reading: What you mass effect Romance Says About You: Brutal Callout Post Edition
As a quarian, Tali must wander the galaxy in a skin-tight plug suit and face mask lest they become fatally ill from alien germs from, say, dirty people like Commander Shepard. Because of this, Tali is doing everything in her power to prepare her immune system for the worst so that she can be around Shepard (the male version) during their romance Mass Effect 2 And 3.
I hope I have now successfully secured my own Tali photo mass effect Fans like me will be getting more updates on the upcoming fourth game in the series sooner rather than later. It’s been two years since ME4 Announcement, BioWare, and we’re out of it Fan theories as to whether or not Shepard is back. My plate tempts. Keelah se’lai.