A Scottish cycle path appears to be laid out like a newsboy

A screenshot of Edinburgh's winding cycle path alongside a similar screenshot in Paperboy.

picture: Dave McCraw / Atari / Mobygames / Kotaku

There’s a street in Edinburgh, Scotland that offers a real-life version of newsboy‘s zigzag bike routes, and that’s exactly what I’m here to celebrate. As part of the city £207m (US$253m) project. A new stretch of cycle path has been created to run trams through the famous street, which a recent tweeted video shows presents a rather daunting challenge.

While the Scottish Cycle Route has been mocked since it officially opened in April, you can’t really appreciate the video game-like layout of it all until you see Dave McCraw’s video of the absolutely crappy design.

There is so much special here. Like any good game, the track not only has an excellent zigzag pattern to learn, but also all sorts of obstacles. There are those giant planters bumping into the alley to avoid. And in fact Lampposts sticking out of the track on the other hand.

As you’ve probably noticed, the design is such that your bike has to negotiate several other lanes of traffic, including sidewalks (sidewalks, they’re called sidewalks), while swerving left and right violently to try to keep up with it, which is difficult directions.

Unfortunately, the NPC AI looks pretty awful when they’re casually wandering down the bike path, even if you rush towards them quickly. In this respect, there is still considerable room for improvement.

I think my favorite feature is the supermarket exit that goes right into the bike lane because they make it harder for all players by removing the bike lane texture entirely!

This is my official call for a special meeting to be organized in this very place in 2024 to celebrate the 40th anniversary of newsboy‘s first release.

Look it’s scary:

A screenshot of Paperboy's zigzag sidewalks.

screenshot: Mobygames / Atari

Slow News Day? You can bet on it.

https://kotaku.com/paperboy-cycle-lane-bike-cycling-atari-scotland-edinbur-1849084667 A Scottish cycle path appears to be laid out like a newsboy

Curtis Crabtree

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